Something has change

Something has change in me. Something that myself even myself did not realize till now. Does this shows a good sign of change? Or something bad that I not suppose to change of? I do not know and I wish I knew. Today I have a bad dream. Some dream that makes me regret of something that I did not take my courage in doing it. The things that really makes me think of WHY I did not complete the things. Something that I should have done quite some time ago but I did not do it. This really makes me regret thinking of it. Why why?
I begin to hate myself. I do not have confident on this kind of matter. I do not have the courage to do it. Unlike in class, for every Question, there is always an exact answer. However in this, there is no exact answer. But I knew that if I did not have the courage to do it, how can I see the changes?
I’m so tired.
Tired of the war that rages in my head.
War of opposition styles and ways of thinking. I’m so tired of all this.
Maybe I think too much. Something that I should not have think of. But if I do not think of it. Does it solve the problems? Its beyond my control. Someway somehow I just regretted of everything that happen and every steps that I’ve taken.
I’m so tired of my life. my appearance does shows a happy and have no worries character. However, am i?
I’m just tired of all that happens.
Guess I’ll stay out of everything for time being.